So after many weeks and such of my 18 month old coughing, hacking, wheezing and altogether sounding like a 70 year old smoker..She has been diagnosed with asthma.
And we went through a 2.5 hour attack on Sunday night. It was hell. An 18 months old coughing like she had emphysema for over 2 hours is not good for one's mood or complexion. Did I feel bad for her? Yes. My heart melted. Was I pissed because my sleep was apparently not going to happen? Heck yes. Why me? Why do these things happen to me? The other night I was dealing with a 3 year old with severe stomach cramps and poop coming out his booty like a freaking faucet. Yeah. Not going back to Friendlys anytime soon. Certainly was NOT a friendly experience all around.
So I brought little Cam Bam to the doctors after her bout of NOT BEING ABLE TO BREATHE to the doctors and they hand me every contraption necessary. Which I am familiar with because I, also, am plagued with the dreaded "ASTHMAR", as my friends lovingly call it..Oh great..Here comes ASTHMAR. Kinda like we made asthma a person and gave him a personality. "I can't laugh too hard right now...Asthmar is visiting." Wow. That sounds like he's Hindu or something. Anyhoo.
Right now I am a slave to the freaking nebulizer and the 4-7 treatments a day I have to administer to an 18 month old. I repeat. An 18 month old. Have you ever tried to administer a smoking pipe that makes a loud noise to an 18 month old? I didn't think so. It's like wearing open toed shoes (especially WHITE ones) in winter. It just isn't happening in my world. At least without a fight..And I am a bulldog.
Cambria is doing well with her treatments so far. Tonight we did have to hold her down for a bit and blow the medicine in her face..I believe this is called a "shottie" in the drug world. So, yes, I was giving "shotties" to my 18 month old. But the greatest is when she actually "smokes" the little "pipe". Am I going to video it?? Heck yes! I could probably make a killing constructing my own antidrug commerical!
This is all a bit frustrating as she spits out ALL oral medication (yes...calling doctor tomorrow since she has had NO doses of the oral steriods..But her clothes?? They are probably growing bigger by the second with the amount she has spit out on them..hahaha)
And, yet another thing to add to Cam Bam's list o' drama. She fell at the "Y" today and gave herself a big 'ol shiner. Yup. No one knows how she did it. She just fell into some book cases and out she came with a black eye. She's a royal wreck if there ever was one.
But the worst?
Was when Chris walked in the door tonight and said:
"Hey crack baby! When you gonna smoke your crack pipe?"
Oh my Lord. I REALLY hope the neighbors didn't hear that...ALthough with my luck and with the door wide open? The ENTIRE neighborhood heard.